Snuggles, I write this while the warmth of your fur, the music of your purr and the love
in your eyes is still fresh in my mind...
I write this as a salute to you, for all you have given our family over the years...
I write this as a way of dealing with my own pain and loss at your departure from this
life...
and I write this to share with others experiencing the same thing...
I remember a day 14 - 15 years ago...I opened the front door and a tiny, 6 week old ball of fluff dashed in, ran into the middle of the living room, sat down and gave me a look that clearly stated "I'm here!!" Nothing wishy-washy, very matter of fact, subject not open to question...she knew she was home and that was the end of the subject as far as she was concerned!
Not many people lived in this area and after doing some checking I found out that no one knew anything about this little grey kitten. No one had seen her. No one knew of a litter of kittens in the area. No one had seen any kitten(s) being dropped off.
Her infinite kitty-wisdom had proven true...she was indeed home!
What a delight she was! She quickly earned the name Snuggles due to her never-ending desire to snuggle (especially in my long hair). She loved to play ball with nerf balls and small hi-bounce balls (which she would catch in mid-air between her paws) and bring them right back to be thrown/bounced again and again and again...
Ah come on, you KNOW you want
to throw this ball for me!
Of course she also loved the usual kitten-favorites of batting papers,
chasing strings and investigating absolutely everything! But when she discovered my
sons Chimpmunk Van (he was 4 at the time)...this quickly became her most favorite.
By removing the side panel of the van, she could get into it...
then would talk and talk and talk...
until you finally agreed to push it around and
give her a ride in it!
Well, come on now... lets go for a ride!
Of course, she eventually got too big for the Chipmunk Van but never lost that love of riding. Instead, she found the next best thing...vacuum cleaners! Not only did she love to sit on a vacuum to get a free ride, but if you were using a canister type, she just loved to be vacuumed! I think she had a hard time deciding at times which was the best thing...to sit on it or in front of it demanding fair and equal treatment with the carpet!
A year later, a small, starved bundle of matted fur stood shivering on the doorstep and Tigger joined the family. From day one, they were constant companions as she helped to nurse him back to health (according to the vet, he might have survived one more day had he not been rescued). She took him under her wing and taught him the ropes. She did this with each new addition to the family (including the Italian Greyhound - a miniature Greyhound for those of you not familiar with the breed). There was no doubt who was the Matriarch of this family!
(left to right) Tigger, Snuggles and Pandy, togetherness at its best!
But it didn't stop with the other furry four leggeds that joined our
family.
She took care of each of us humans as well through the years.
She knew when we were sad or upset and would come to offer her love and support...
be it a gently placed paw on your arm,
an invite to be purred
or simply getting into your lap and being with you.
She would look you square in the eye and speak to you in her own language about whatever
was going on.
If you were sick, she knew it.
If you were injured, she knew it.
She would make a beeline to the spot that was causing the trouble and massage by kneeding
it with her paws.
If it was an emotional pain, she kneaded the area of your heart.
If you needed a good laugh, she found a way to provide that as well.
Her infinite kitty-wisdom knew no boundries!
About a month ago, she developed a small lump under her eye. At first we thought it was a bug bite but it didn't go away. About a week later, we took her to the vet. It was a cancerous tumor that could not be operated on. We gave her medication to help with the swelling and to reduce secondary infections, but she went downhill fast...in less than one week it looked like the time had come to return to the vet one last time and have her euthanized. We decided to stop her medication just in case she was having negative reactions to it (the vet fully agreed). She showed immediate improvement and we were delighted that she would be with us for at least a short time longer.
The decision to euthanize is an easy one in theory. No one wants to see a loved one in pain and enduring great suffering. But when it comes down to doing it, even if you know it is the right thing to do, there is nothing easy about it.
These last few days we knew the time was coming, but hope springs
eternal and as our very wonderful and compassionate veternarian said: "You
don't want to do it a minute too soon, but, you don't want to do it a minute too
late." How do you know when it is time? We knew the signs to watch
for...we prayed to know when it was the right time. These last couple of
days, she seemed to withdraw more. The other cats watched her with concern. We
saw the physical changes.
Our family cried silent tears.
This morning we knew it was time. No guessing, no questions. The tumor had pushed its way through her skin. We each sat and held her, talking to her, petting her and sharing our love with her. Our tears were no longer silent. How do you say good-bye to one that has been such a vital part of your family for so many years? The only way you can...with love.
We all knew it was the right thing to do. The last gift of love that we could give our sweet Snuggles, the caretaker that had offered her love to all freely and touched our lives and our hearts in so many ways over the years.
Our wonderful Vet allowed our family to be with her as she entered into
this final and peaceful sleep...surrounded by those that have loved her throughout her
entire life.
We all miss her...we know she will live on in our hearts, though not by our sides.
We are all better for having known her, loved her and been loved by her.
Godspeed Sweet Snuggles, Godspeed
~Snuggle's family
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